Romance Manual for Married People

Woman Fixing Husband's Tie In Bedroom - Cavan Images/The Image Bank/Getty Images

Keeping passion alive in your relationship is one of your biggest challenges as married people – whether you’re newlyweds or you’ve reached the 50th anniversary or beyond. It requires great effort and dedication on the part of both spouses. Here are 10 ways you can get started on bringing romance into your marriage – and keeping it there:

1.  Infuse romance into the everyday.
The romance does not have to end when you return from the honeymoon. When you can, do little things to let your spouse know you care about him or her. You’d be surprised what an unexpected love note in one’s briefcase can do for a relationship.

2.  Have good sex.
One marriage counselor and therapist after another says that sex is a vital part of successful marriages. If you're having problems in the bedroom, talk it out with your spouse and consider seeing a medical doctor or sex therapist if the issue requires professional help to get resolved. Even if things are hot and heavy in the bedroom, you can always make improvements.

3.  Woo your spouse with kisses.
Kissing and touching your spouse is a great way to keep the heat between you burning. Increase the romance factor by surprising your spouse with an extraordinarily passionate kiss every so often. It doesn't always have to lead to sex, but it plants the seed for future encounters and makes the day a little more exciting.


4.  Never take your spouse for granted.
Too many couples fall into a rut because they start to just expect their partner to always be there and they quit courting one another. But marriage -- at least in part -- is an agreement to court each other forever. Keep going out on dates and getting silly with each other. Take the position that the fun does not have to end just because you said, "I do."

5.  Resolve issues that get in the way of romance.
One of the biggest obstacles to romance is tension and stress that arises between couples who are having problems -- from an overly intrusive mother-in-law to unpaid bills. Discuss problems as they arise and try to find solutions that will satisfy both of you. If the problems are too big for the two of you to handle on your own, seek help.

6.  Create a love nest.
Make your home conducive to romance, a sanctuary where the two of you have privacy and tranquillity. Setting the mood for romance in the dining room, bathroom, and certainly bedroom is not difficult, nor does it have to cost a lot of money.

7.  Be more adventurous.
After a couple has been together a while, they tend to get a little bored. When this happens, you have to spice things up by foregoing your usual routine. Take an impromptu vacation, try a new move in the bedroom, get dressed up for a night on the two with each other. The unexpected always makes life a little more exciting.

8.  Indulge yourself.
This might not sound appropriate for a list on how to be more romantic and keep passion alive in your marriage. But when you take care of yourself -- tending to your health and hygiene, de-stressing, participating in activities that boost your self-esteem, you will be a better lover and friend to your spouse. Alleviating insecurity, after all, makes you more sure of yourself, your relationships, and your choices.

9.  Celebrate your love.
Make a big deal out of holidays, anniversaries, and birthdays. Do special things for one another and create your own unique traditions. Life is short, so we should celebrate it every chance we get.

10.  Remain faithful to one another.
Betrayal and lies will eat away at any relationship, especially a marriage. It's difficult for couples, no matter how in love they are, to recover from cheating. Preventing infidelity and working to improve the relationship you have rather than seeking a new one is important to keeping your marriage safe. Without trust, your partner will not be able to love you and keeping passion and romance alive in your marriage will become impossible.